I Tried a Final Fantasy XIV Chocobo Pizza. Kind Of.

A few days ago, Domino’s stores in Australia started offered a garland of Final Fantasy XIV-branded pizzas. Most of these are only pizzas they routinely sell, though with lovable new names, like Moogle’s Meatlovers or Stormblood Supreme, though there is one special pizza on a menu that’s new and singular to this promotion. Yes, I’m articulate about a Chocobo-themed Chocobo Chow pizza.

Let’s get down to it: Domino’s is observant that a Chocobo, essentially, is zilch though a vast chicken. Chocobo are darling creatures that can be ridden, petted, nicknamed, and come finish with their possess amazingly familiar thesis music. I’d never unequivocally suspicion about how one would taste but, OK, let’s go along with it.

I live in England, so we couldn’t indeed sequence an central Chocobo Chow pizza from Domino’s. So we motionless to put a UK lot to a test, and improvise whatever they couldn’t hoop by approach of a tradition pizza order.

The central outline of a Chocobo Chow: a vast vessel pizza with a tomato base, unchanging cheese, chicken, pineapple, capsicum (mixed peppers), mushrooms, onion and open onion.

The pineapple’s immediately environment off alarm bells. The UK’s Domino’s don’t offer spring onion so we baked some and combined it myself. This Frankenstein’s monster cost over £20 regulating a restaurant’s create-your-own function, with one assisting of any topping.

I direct we try a Chocobo Chow… ARHHHHHH!

How was it? Well, how do we think? we would contend we learned that pairing pineapple, peppers and duck on one pizza is a terrible idea, though that was apparent from a start. All 3 of those toppings have contrary flavours and graphic textures which, in one vast mass, only don’t work together. Throw in all a other gubbins on there and there’s just approach too most going on during once. Too many ingredients, too many tastes that don’t element any other, too small thought. This is a bad, bad idea for a pizza.

On tip of a quite foodie side, we couldn’t stop meditative about my darling Chocobo from Final Fantasy XV a whole time we ate. Bite after bite, I’d inwardly moan as a Chocobo thesis ran by my mind. And after picking off all a pineapple and other yucky bits, we finished it off before solemnly mourning a pleasing bird.

Square Enix: we should be ashamed of this abomination. we empathize a innocent Australian who knows zero of Final Fantasy though who, on walking into a pizza joint, likes a sound of a Chocobo Chow. “That’s only duck yeah mate?” No mate. It’s far, distant worse than that.

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